Stay In Your Lane
Dear Durable Minds,
Some of my players are so focused on what their teammates are or are not doing that it is creating additional drama, causing them to lose sight of their own responsibilities. While I appreciate having extra eyes on the field, it is not their role. Do you have any suggestions? - Stay In Your Lane
“Starve your distractions. Feed your focus. ” -Unknown
Dear Stay In Your Lane,
I recently met with a coaching staff to gain key insights into their recent success. Let's be clear: it hasn't always been this way. If you've ever heard the saying, "there are too many cooks in the kitchen," it perfectly captures the chaos this team experienced when too many players, coaches, and parents inserted themselves at any given time.
In a sports team or any collaborative environment, this can lead to a myriad of problems. First and foremost, it creates confusion and overlap in responsibilities, as players may feel compelled to monitor and critique their teammates' actions instead of focusing on their tasks.
This not only diminishes individual performance but also sows discord and tension within the team.
Furthermore, the lack of clear leadership can lead to conflicting directions and strategies, undermining the team's cohesion and effectiveness. When everyone is trying to assert their opinions and methods, it can stall progress and lead to decision paralysis, where no meaningful action is taken due to constant disagreements and second-guessing.
Ultimately, this environment stifles creativity, as players might become more focused on not stepping on each other's toes rather than exploring new and effective ways to develop their skills. Let's see how this team overcame these challenges.
Here are a few foundational suggestions for coaches that came from our team visit:
Clearly Define Expectations: Design a simple, one-page sheet clearly defining expectations for all team members, including the athletes, coaching staff, and parents/guardians. Here are some headers you may wish to include:
Team Purpose: In addition to the obvious goal of a winning season or winning the State Cup, this should include the benefits that serve each athlete outside of their competitive activity.
Team Core Values: A beacon or reference point for all daily behavior.
Guiding Quote or Mantra: An inspirational phrase or sentence that speaks to how an athlete may reach their ultimate goal.
General Guidelines for Coaches and Captains: A list of expectations that coaches and captains abide by for the essential growth of ALL team members.
General Guidelines for Athletes: This list may include clearly defined expectations ranging from preparedness to work ethic.
General Guidelines for Parents/Guardians: This list addresses behaviors that help support the athletes and behaviors that might conflict with their athlete's growth or a coach's strategy.
Provide a Link or QR Code to Your Activity's State and/or Organization's Rules and Regulations: This is transparent for all and becomes an important resource to explore when potential questions or conflicts arise.
Provide a Link or QR Code to the Team's Schedule: This may include supporting events such as fundraisers or team activities.
When creating this simple sheet, be creative and use fun language that’s speaks to all involved. They should want to support your expectations not because they are told to but because they are compelled to.
Hold a Team Meeting to Bring These Expectations to Life: It will give everyone an opportunity to ask any questions for clarity.
Encourage Personal Accountability: Encourage your players to focus on their performance and responsibilities. Regular one-on-one check-ins can be beneficial to discuss individual progress and areas for improvement. This also gives players the opportunity to voice any concerns or frustrations they might have.
Provide Additional Accountability: If an athlete falls short of holding themselves accountable to the expectations this will provide an additional level of accountability ensuring stability of the culture.
Here are a few foundational suggestions for parents that supported the team in which we visited:
Understand and Respect Roles:
Parents play a crucial role in supporting their child's athletic journey, but it's important to understand and respect the boundaries between their role and that of the coaches. Here are some key points for parents, which are sometimes easier said than done:
Be a Positive Support System: Encourage your child to focus on their own performance and responsibilities. Provide emotional support and celebrate their efforts and achievements, regardless of the outcome.
Communicate Constructively: If you have concerns or suggestions, communicate them directly and respectfully with the coaches during appropriate times. Avoid discussing these matters in front of the athletes or during practice or competition, as it can create unnecessary tension.
Model Good Behavior: Show respect for the coaches' decisions and strategies, even if you disagree with them. Your attitude towards the coaches will influence how your child perceives and respects their authority.
Promote Team Cohesion: Encourage your child to support their teammates and focus on their own development. Remind them that while noticing others' actions is natural, their primary responsibility is their own performance and growth.
Stay Informed and Involved: Attend meetings, read provided materials, and stay up-to-date with team schedules and rules. This ensures you are well-informed and can support your child and the team effectively.
Avoid Sideline Coaching: Resist the urge to give your child instructions during games or practices, even if you have extensive background in the sport. It will distract your athlete and may interfere with their development or a particular strategy or tactic. Trust the coaches to provide the necessary guidance. Your role is to cheer and offer positive reinforcement.
Encourage Open Dialogue: Foster an environment at home where your child feels comfortable discussing their experiences and challenges. Listen actively and offer guidance without imposing your opinions on how the team should be managed.
By following these guidelines, parents can create a supportive environment that reinforces the coaches' efforts and helps athletes thrive both on and off the field.
Here are a few foundational suggestions for athletes from the team in which we visited:
As an athlete, self-accountability is crucial for your growth and success. Meeting the expectations set by your coaches not only enhances your performance but also contributes to the overall success of the team. Consider the following:
Understand the Expectations: Take the time to thoroughly understand what your coaches expect from you. This includes understanding the team’s goals, your specific role, and the standards for behavior and performance. If anything is unclear, don't hesitate to ask for clarification.
Maintain a Positive Attitude: Approach your training and games with a mindset. Be open to constructive criticism and use it as a tool for improvement. Remember that your coaches' feedback is meant to help you grow.
Self-Reflection and Assessment: Regularly evaluate your performance and behavior. After practices and games, take some time to reflect on what you did well and what areas need improvement. Be honest with yourself and use this self-assessment to make necessary adjustments.
Set Next-Day Objectives: Set 1-2 objectives for your next practice or game based on your needs from the prior practice or game. Communicate with your coaching staff so they can help ensure you get the repetition and can help hold the gift of accountability.
Stay Organized: Keep track of your training schedules, game plans, and any additional responsibilities. Being organized helps you stay on top of your tasks and ensures you are prepared for practices and competitions.